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you know about the voices that speaks in your head?i listen to them somtimes. most of the times. sometimes they tell me good things. sometimes they make me wish for bad things. |
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about this blog
it's basically the inside of sakinah's brain.but mercifully edited, censored, and anaesthesised with a heavy dose of prozac. tagboard
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Design: doughnutcrazyIcon: morphine_kissed |
Not in the best of moods
There's the boy with the band-aids, holding four out in his hand like charity. Brown, white, dots or stripes. He looked serious as he held them out but the other boy had to bend over with his hand on his stomach, 'cause he was laughing so damn hard. *** Wooden floor with horizontal lines running across. Great God. *** Cheap white rug spotted with polka dots. He's going crazy. Fucking awesome. *** He wore glasses now because his contact lens were missing. But he still faithfully traced his fingers along the scabs and the burns, no doubt with four band-aids ready in his pocket. There's rock music in the background, even though the crazy one knows it's all in his head. Somebody drilled the musician into his head and now the choir is singing 'Insanus' on a loop. Yes, he must be crazy. Especially if he's falling in love. ***
Labels: dailies Water shortage day 2
So today we had to use the facilities offered by the Engineering faculty because the spanking brand new toilet with black stone flooring failed to deliver water to 30-odd girls clamoring for shower and relief. As Som put it, we looked like mak ciks. Yes, mak ciks who couldn't afford to pay the water bill (or better yet, who don't have any homes to return to because some drug-addicted husband sold the mortgage to satisfy his meth needs) so they had to use free water at some random complex to do their laundry and miscellaneous.I don't even know why I'm reporting these things, but I do know I'm going to be late for Pathology if I keep this up. I've just been so lazy to study lately, even worse than how it was for Year 1 Sem 2. Must do something to reverse this situation. Labels: dailies Elixir of Life
Hasyim should try being a little sweeter, IMO. He can be such a bloody jackass.On another note, the 2nd RC should seriously inform students about water shortage if they're going to face some damn problems about it. Serious fucking shit. At least, then we could have stored water earlier rather than climbing up to the 4th-fucked-up floor carrying a pail of water and splashing the majority of it on the cement floor along the process. Ah well, c'est la vie, benim öğrenci, apa boleh buat. . . Still. That's one morning exercise I could do without. find me an acre of whine
 I like the irony.It's been nearly two weeks since IPTA throughout M'sia opened their doors to fresh undergraduates, and by now, I reckon all (if not most) are very familiar with the term 'orientation'. In my case, 'orientation' is but a thinly disguised form of 'ragging', that infamous culture where seniors degrade and humiliate freshmen in public. Although technically, there's no ragging whatsoever, just simple orientation. Ragging? What ragging? We don't need a rag to wipe no sorry ass. In light of the RMC incident (I'm sure the parents do not see this as anything so... apologise-able, and my heartfelt condolences goes to them) there has been a serious crackdown of 'orientation/ragging' by the university management. Any peep of excessive show of seniority, any wisp of untoward behaviour by 20>year old supposedly educated university students, and one faces immediate expulsion. Kudos on that, I say, and about fucking time. Because the excuse that seniors use orientation as a way to 'get to know the juniors better' is definitely not helping much. Understandably enough, there's a reasonable amount of complaint about this new policy within the ranks of seniors. Especially seeing as how the juniors are having it super easy compared to the previous years (before the entire operation was plugged out of course). And yet, there are still students who complained about it openly *ahem*FACEBOOK*ahem*. I couldn't help but feel a twinge of derisive contempt at this student for not being able to take in a couple of degrading comments. What, did he think that the doctors and nurses he was going to be working with are going to happily pat his head as he fumbles along with the lives of patients? Or does he seriously thinks he's good enough to have his ego spared? On that note, do any of the juniors think that they're good enough? If so, then I'm afraid to say that is a sad misconception. Don't get me wrong, the sting of my own orientation is still throbbing and I can relate to the shame the juniors are crying out of unfairness and unjust, but it has definitely taught me humility. We gritted through it and came out with heads hung low, but we learned to keep our pride intact and make the best of the situation. Sort of. To think that Microsoft babies like us (and the Neolithic cavemen before us, God bless them) fared better than the iPad kids makes me want to cry for the future. Labels: rants kyuugou is an awesome doujinshika
1 Malaysia is a government endorsed political ideology that's spreading faster than the plague. I don't hate the concept, nor am I saying it's impossible, but it has a tendency to highlight the segregation of races, especially during orientation week at UM. I find it supremely ironic to have 300 fresh undergraduates (re: meat) chanting, "UM is ONE! ONE Malaysia!" while the Malays huddle with the Malays, the Chinese with the Chinese, the Indians with the Indians and the lain-lain with... well actually they seem to mix around quite well, so kudos there.It's hilarious, really. One dental friend once commented that he might pull out from the college dinner because the committee dumped him to a table full of Indians. He probably meant to say, 'Because the committee dumped me to a table where my friends aren't there,' so I didn't take much offense but another friend who overheard the conversation got her fur rather bristled by the remark. Hmm. I'm not all that interested in racial unity, to tell the truth. It's intriguing, and I do feel concerned, but it's just that I've always been more interested in hanging out with people of similar interests irregardless of heritage or skin colour. Isn't it more fun that way? Anime, manga, games, pillows, story books, movies, etc. We share a lot more in common compared to unique rituals and traditions that can be observed but not followed. Of course, individuals and opinions vary as much as the hair on my cats' body. 1M is probably steering Malaysians to a better, harmonious future, and there probably are conclusive results and findings to back it up. I'm probably just being a skeptical paranoid little girl who's trying to run away from the fact that the new sem is starting next Monday. And that my new room is on the highest floor so it's going to be a pain to lug all my stuff upstairs. But I just can't help but remember the time when Cik Rabiatul commented how my friends and I seemed to be the most 'mixed' group of friends (re: troublemakers) throughout the school, and we laughed back at her, 'Teacher, we never noticed that we're different!' because that was the truth. Why notice the difference now? Labels: thoughts shitshitshitshitshitshit
Why must Malaysians live in gated houses? I know that Putrajaya houses aren't gated but I live in Kota Damansara not across the road from the federal building!See what happened to my car!  Here, I'll blow it up for you,  Blow me up as well while you're at it! Ugh, how come this shit doesn't happen when Nadia's driving? And I had to ask for help from the detestable neighbour next doors as well because the auntie who lived across the road has forgotten how to drive a manual (the engine died on her). Ugh. I hate this shit. I'm gonna get a good-paying job and hire a chaffeur, damnit. Labels: accident I, Fangirl?
!Warning, this post is a fan-rant! The manga was drawn/written by Asa Higuchi while the animation was produced by A-1 Pictures Inc and directed under the helm of Tsutomu Mizushima who also directed xxxHolic, another anime I enjoyed before CLAMP steered the manga into self-destruction mode. It's FIFA season, but nothing's stopping me from enjoying baseball anime on the side. And what better way to toast teamwork and sports psychology than Ookiku Furikabutte? Now, we have Aniplex backing, good director, solid story and baseball in the mix. Sounds like a winner just as it is. Problem in the equation is that I care squat about baseball. The closest bit I got to holding a mitt and a bat was in high school softball for one game. We were playing defense, I was fielder (God knows where) and none of the girls could hit the ball so we never moved much. It was the most boring game in the world. So, why the sudden interest in Oofuri? For those who know me well, I just have to say pitchercatcher and everything else is self-explanatory. Even so, it's not the only attraction that Oofuri offers. There's a good dose of comedy available, be it impressions or inside-joke baseball jargon. The characters mesh together so well, and their interaction almost feels like a real gang of friends playing ball and having fun. Of course, it's not all joy and laughter as the team challenges themselves to new levels in each step of the competition. There's a lot of work to be done, strategy planning to be thought of and morale to uphold. Asa Higuchi is a graduate of sports psychology, and a baseball fanatic, so she (yes, you read that right, she) incorporated a lot of her knowledge in her work. Everything might seem overwhelming to a baseball beginner, heck, even daunting, but underneath the complexities of Japanese high school baseball, Oofuri stuck to the basic of the basics. Have fun. Enjoy yourselves. Learn about your limits and possibilities. The icing on the cake for this philosophy is arguably the pitcher of the Nishiura High, Mihashi Ren; a timid boy traumatized by his experience as a pitcher for his previous school. He became the outcast in his own team because they thought he only got the position out of favoritism. He carried the stigma with him to high school, and remained doubtful of his ability despite much-deserved praise from his new teammates. Who can blame him, though? Tell a person he's useless over and over again, and in time, he might come to believe it himself. The season 2 finished with a... downward slope for the Nishiura High, but I'm optimistic for more. Sports anime, especially baseball, is usually well-received with higher chances of being continued. All that's left is for Asa Higuchi to work out her charm and bring out the best in her boys and we'll sit back, gnaw out hangnails in frustration and anticipation, and enjoy the game. Labels: anime, manga, rants, sports Child's Play
 Remember this? Well, it's now THIS  Went to watch it with my sisters at Cineleisure, and I have to say, Disney does not disappoint. It's been 11 years since I watched the first movie and, boy, that changes the perspective of this movie for me. Nevertheless, the jokes were witty and targeted to both young and old, so it's enjoyable for all. It's remarkably different from it's predecessors as well in the sense that it's darker, and closer to real life. Growing up has never been easy, whilst letting go is doubly so. :( I could go on emo rant for hours, but I got something else from Cineleisure that's worth mentioning!  It's an official FIFA 2010 phone strap/card holder! Ahaha, despite having lost, the spirit of the Three Lions shall persevere! Although I mostly bought it out of Hetalia-ness (Ahahah, fucking lame). If I were to buy something out of football, I'd definitely have spent my money on Germany. Sorry Iggy, but I always bet for the better team. Better luck next... oh, whenever you guys start playing as a team instead of a group of 11 star-studded players. And finally, check out Nephew, this Danish rock band that's kick-ass awesome! I'm addicted to the song, "007 Is Also Gonna Die". Part of the lyrics went, "What if God/Won't bless the whore". To which I thought, "Wow, now she's really fucked up." Addicted to Nephew
He swung a leg over the wolf's side, and tightened his grip by pressing his knees into the wolf's ribs, leaving his hands free. The wolf reared its head in discomfort, sending ripples of movement across the framework he's sitting on, but the boy laughed and threw his arms out at the sky."Einmal, Tartarus," he said to the wolf, "Ich werde dem Kaiser der Welt werden." The wolf began to move, maneuvering itself between trees and shrubs. It kept it's body low all the time, periodically sniffing at the air for the prey. The trees towered high above them, with branches mushrooming overhead that provide little shelter from ground animals. The wolf felt naked and exposed. Carrying a madman on its back didn't help much, either. A twig snapped nearby, and the wolf stopped dead in its tracks as its ears pricked up trying to locate the source. Nothing moved except for leaves falling and grass bending in the breeze. "Fisch ist lecker," murmured the boy absent-mindedly. The wolf growled for silence, and got only a smack on the head as a reply. "Ruhig sein, Tartarus!" he chided the wolf. But they were both silenced when men in green appeared behind trees with bows and swords aimed at them. The wolf flicked a gaze behind, and saw three men inching closer to them. They were completely surrounded. "Let go of the boy, Tartarus," said one of the men. "You've been kidnapping blonde children from around these parts, and killing them in your den. That boy has been entrusted to us by his guardian, and to hell with you if you think we're gonna let you go with him." Kidnap? The wolf bared it's teeth and raised its hackles at the men. It has never kidnapped any human child. "No? Then what do you call the meat you have on your back?" The wolf felt the tug of fur as the boy shifted in his seating and slid down its side. The boy patted it on the side of its head, and murmured, "Sie sind Idioten, eh Tartarus?" and the wolf could not help but growl in agreement. This boy is nothing so ordinary as a human child. He is a madman, a master, its mother and father, the devil himself. "Ich bin der Kaiser der Welt." **** Alissa said she might be continuing the SaYuKo Collab, a little project the three of us have been doing since Form 3. Or Form 2, I'm not sure. Now, I'm extremely out of touch with fantasy writing, so in order not to make an ass of myself in front a Journalist student and a student studying in UK, I thought it's best that I try and get myself back in shape. Of course, provided we all can find the time in our busy schedules for SaYuKo and each other. Otherwise, the resurgence of SaYuKo will remain as an idea, a beautiful idea, but just an idea nonetheless. Sorry for the bad German. And now my cat is scolding me.  She's cute when she's sleeping, but she screams a lot when she's awake. |