anxiety
I just want to vomit
and

try not to
break

that extra .20 could be used for plenty
more pedestrian walkways.

pedestrian walkways that are user friendly to wheelchairs, and with a berth wide enough for people to walk their dogs without worrying about bothering other people.

zebra crossings.

road repairs.

manhole repairs.

more bridges.

MRT.

more pedestrian walkways that are user-friendly.

better road planning.

road planning.



bursting out from silence

It's been a while. Micro-blogging, social networking sites, and game apps have taken over whatever's left of my attention span. I can't say it's been a total waste (whoo hoo new follower on tumblr!!) but it certainly does make me feel a whole lot less productive. If anything, it makes me feel increasingly tolerant of being an idle couch potato, social waste, and all-around insignificant 23-year old. Oh yay quarterly-life crisis.

Honestly, I am at the brink of an implosion.

And some of my generational peers are probably feeling the same internal stress; the conflicting desire to have things ready, the trapped youthful energy wanting to experiment, and the physical constraints of reality that weigh down on just about everything. Rawr. It's not surprising that many Malaysian youths opt for sarcasm or dark humour as a preferred form of response, especially in the great anonymity that the internet offers. 

Take this one example taken from an internet article about the i-Miev: 


Would Malaysians have said something like this if they were talking face-to-face though?

Probably yes.

I'm being completely presumptuous of course. Social networking via forums and messaging feedback such as these lacks many crucial social cues that would construct the interaction in a way that better reflects a real life scenario. That's not to say that this site isn't a part of real life, no, but I'm talking physical human interaction. Body language, voice inflections, pats and blows- that sorta thing.

That said, if MP Kinabatangan, Mr Bung Mokhtar had the chance to physically get down and dirty with the kampung folk, would he still have made a callous remark such as the one he did over the increase in oil price? 


Honestly, that statement ought to send all pseudo-journalism skills by third rate bloggers into a frenzy. I know I am, and I'm a no-rate! Sure hope this guy is managing Kinabatangan better than how he manages his social life. 

That said, I have a few questions for you, dear readers. 

Have you ever found yourself saying something on the internet that you would have never said in real life? And by something, I mean, something hurtful, incriminating, etc... all sorts of nasties that reflect a truth but exaggerate it's proportions like some funky magic mirror in a fun house. If you have, how did that made you feel about yourself? Nasty, but necessary, perhaps?

The barrage of questions is just a footnote as I paradoxically do my own introspection and gleam over this entry I have just pulled out of my ass.

I feel like an implosion within an implosion.