moving forward to make that dream a reality has got to be one of the most fulfilling sense of achievement imaginable. but lately, it's getting a little embarrassing to share dreams together with peers. not that the content of the imagination itself is anything to be shy about, but the conscious comparison one can't help but draw when one speaks dreams out loud. there are others who have managed to make their dreams come true, and there are others who simply have to make do with what they have. then there are those who rot away underneath, because their dreams grew too ripe with nary a hope of being plucked. i see that a lot with people around me. they grow old and burdened, sighing little voices of regret to themselves every now and then. they still brave on though, because life doesn't end when dreams die (rather, some people would say that children grow up when they stop dreaming...but what kind of twisted grown-up would that make?). they pass on their dreams to the young, and it is up to them what to do with it because they might have their own secret dream as well.

my own personal dreams have been extremely varied. it ranged from owning a large private house to being a unicorn princess (cue condescending laughter) and such other fancies. now that i have grown older and am able to review my dreams more objectively, i say that i definitely want to learn more languages. there are thousands of spoken languages today, and imagine how many of those are written with some of the most exquisite use of phrase and cultural charm, and i'm clueless about it because i can't read the language! being bilingual in multi-cultural malaysia has lots of advantages, but it is also a sore reminder of what else i'm missing out on. there are certain things that can't be conveyed in a literary translation, not unless it ruins the flow of the story and the authors' style of writing, and i think it's a dreadful pity that intricate, hidden nuances such as these had to be destroyed in order to make the story more accessible to the general public. reason as to why al-Quran is kept in its original text, which makes arabic a top language to learn, besides japanese and german. mandarin isn't a bad choice either, what with the global economical trend leaning towards china.

i am sad that i haven't utilised bahasa malaysia as well as i could have. it's a shame, actually. went to the UM library some time ago to borrow books, hoping to come across a. samad saids' famous salina, but they only had one copy of the book and it was all the way over at the cultural faculty. growing up with a limited selection of bahasa books was definitely a major factor that turned me to english. sastera is difficult to learn, and there wasn't any bahasa books geared for adventure and mysticism suited for younger children back then. i remember having to whet my appetite with mastika once usman awang proved to be too hard for me to grasp. nowadays, whenever i stroll to the bahasa section, it doesn't seem like the selection of choices have varied much. most are romance novels with flowery words and religious values interwoven into the story. the entire section gives of the general feeling that once you've read one, you've read them all.